I M A Collector's Item, R U ?

Webster’s Dictionary defines a collectors item as, “… an item whose rarity or excellence makes it especially worth collecting.” With the foregoing in mind, consider the question, “Are you a collector’s item?” Even if you’re not, you no doubt live close to one or more. Especially if you live in Beaumont.

For example, I am a collector’s item because I am a South Park Greenie. They are not making anymore Greenies. This means that Greenies are growing rarer with the passing of each day. And they are not making anymore Beaumont High Royal Purples. Nor or they making anymore Charlton-Pollard Bulldogs, Hebert Panthers, French Buffaloes, Forest Park Trojans or Beaumont Charlton-Pollard Jaguars

Get the picture? Times have changed. Schools have closed and/or merged. I have been away from Beaumont for years but as I understand it, there was a merging of South Park, Hebert and Forest Park resulting in West Brook High School. Then there was the merging of Charlton-Pollard, French and Beaumont High culminating in Central High School. Later Ozen High School opened. So currently there are the West Brook Bruins, the Central Jaguars and the Ozen Panthers.

But just think of all the collector’s items there must be in Beaumont. Search the internet and you will see that all of those original schools are still having reunions. We may be down but we’re not out.

Have you ever considered auctioning yourself on E-Bay? There’s a lot of collector’s stuff on that web site. Just think of the ads we might see: “One Greenie, used but still kicking and breathing. Will sell to the highest bidder.” If you are a Purple and ever wanted to own a Greenie, you could just check out E-Bay and see what gives.

How about this one, “Hebert Panther with lots of growl left.” Or “French High Buffalo … hurry, this one won’t last long.” Or “Charlton-Pollard Bulldog that loves to feast on Panthers.” Well you get the drift. If we are becoming rarer with the passing of each day and if truly we are collector’s items then we should act like it.

And who can predict what is down the road for the Beaumont schools? Let’s say that in about 20 years, West Brook merges with Central. Would we have West Central Brook or Central Brook West? And of course should that occur there would no longer be the Bruins or Jaguars. Maybe it would be the Central Brook West Blue Bears or Golden Kitty Kats. Given enough time, it could grow to be pretty confusing.

Just for a real stretch, let’s say that one day Home Schooling becomes all the rage. Let us imagine that every home was responsible for educating its own children. How many homes would have enough children for a football team? Or even a baseball team? There would of necessity have to be more “one-person” sports. Each family would have one tennis player. How would you like to be the newspaper sportswriter keeping up with all of the individual Home School athletes? Can’t you just see the size of the sports section? There would be page after page describing newsy sporting events such as how Tom Smith beat out Oliver Snodgrass for the Franklin Street Golf Championship. Or how that Harry Snyder advanced to the bi-block ping-pong playoffs. Talk about confusing.

But I suppose the collector’s items of this current day should not spend much time mulling over such things. We will not even be here. Our grandchildren and great grandchildren will have to figure it out for themselves.

Besides, when you have pro-sport situations like Giants playing Dolphins and Tigers squaring off against Blue-Jays, I don’t think our grandkids can do any worse.

Winston Hamby
The Beaumont Enterprise
WinHamby@gmail.com